I Was Training for This
Lifting weights prepared me for great change
I haven’t lifted weights for over eight months. I still lift heavy things though. I move furniture around in my apartment; now that I am separated from my husband and getting divorced, I have to figure out how to take up space at home differently. I transfer my largest cast iron pan from the stove to the oven, and then to the counter, when I make dinners that I want to eat now that I am in eating disorder recovery. I contend with bright green plastic storage crates loaded with old real estate contracts now that I am taking on a larger role in my family business; I am stepping up because my mother is ready to wind down her role and we depend on the income. But I have no idea how many pounds I could deadlift right now.
I was training for all of this. I was training to stay mindful during the discomfort of physical and emotional stress. I was training to know when I needed a rest and to recognize when rest wasn’t enough. I was training to be able to recognize when I needed to make changes in my life to support my wellness. In the last few years, I dismantled and reconfigured most of my life and one of the most recent things I changed was the core of my movement practice.
Lifting weights met my wellness needs for nearly two decades: it provided pain management, community, a…
